Unattainable on knees

What do you do when life is reluctant to give you the only thing you've ever asked for? Do you try looking for ways to get yourself the thing or do you wander about with a void in your heart and dried tears in the realms of your eyes? Do you cry yourself to bed or remain awake in wait of that unattainable dream you so earnestly desire to have? I don’t know about the way you deal with this situation (which I’m sure has occurred in everyone’s life at least once) but for someone who has never known and remembered a single instance where (s) he was denied any thing (s) he really wanted; it is extremely difficult to not think of the thing (s) he does not only wish to have but has also grown to fall in love with. Such people probably seek out and strive to get themselves the thing they love. They probably fight all odds of life and win what fate couldn't grant them.  I've always wondered, what’s so unique in an achiever that is envied by all non-achievers, what is so different that makes them get everything they want while others still remain empty handed and heartbroken.
Obviously the pain, the realization and the acceptance of the unattainable kills a part of a person every day. It’s like; you get up every morning with hopes of getting your dream and are left dejected at the end of the day.  While level of determination and perseverance differs from person to person, what remains same for every one is the burden of the unattainable carried in the heart which happens to only increase with each passing day. Even the strongest person would someday break down if this continues for a long time. There is definitely nothing as dejecting as your emotions and desires going unreciprocated by the one you adore or by life itself!
But on the brighter side, it’s making you resistant to any sort of pain. You die every day because of the unattainable thing of your life but each morning you do get up with a hopeful heart, energetic hands ready to deal with any plausible hindrance and a smile (even if it’s visible to you alone)  and look forward to the probable gift of the unattainable that life might bestow you with! Is it not surviving and getting immune to death? Well, I don’t know how you see it but for someone who has never been denied a single thing by life; it is the only way (s) he convinces fate to grant what otherwise wasn't destined for him/her. The thing that makes an achiever a person so enviable by the non achievers is this enigmatic and unspoken virtue of surviving the daily trivial deaths surmounted with the vision of getting through the actual death by making the unattainable  approach them on their knees!

The Wait

Have you ever waited? If yes, for how long and what was the thing you waited for? Was it a 'thing' or something that takes in oxygen and gives out carbon dioxide? Was the wait worth it? Was your patience rewarded? 

Do tell me because I am someone who waited for the wrong things in life. Things that never showed up. Things that made promises of eternity but acted too nonchalantly. They say things in life are transitory but they never complete their sentence. Well, I've realized that the complete sentence ought to be: things in life are transitory, make memories but don't live on them. The things that make us the most happy or unhappy are non-existent. Its just the memory of a thing that makes us overwhelmed. Then why is it that we hold on to memories. What is the wait for when we can just surpass the moment and go exploit the next big goal? The idea of holding on to things of the past or things unreal always itched me but when reality knocks on the door of your imaginations and ideologies you can't just sit back and pretend to have not heard the knock. Reality can neither be ignored or hidden. When reality speaks, life begins and with life come the thousands of moments that keep us on the wait. So the wait is a part of the process of living and living a life is an indicator that reality exists.

 As I sit back and join all the dots, I go back to the thousands of memories I've made with people dead and alive, near and far and I find the answers to my questions; yet when asked to repeat what reality just clarified to me, I  become as unsure and clueless as I was initially. The puzzle of life gets simplified and messed up with each wave that hits the shore; it clears doubts and poses dilemmas with each raindrop that kisses the ground. And we the oxygen-takers-and-carbon-dioxide-givers are mere spectators who witness the process and try getting our heads into the whole thing just to satisfy our vanity.

The next time reality knocks your door to explain the reason behind the wait, do tell me what the answers to my questions are. And there I am....in the wait again....of finding answers to questions answered time and again!

To all the guys I've loved before...

     There's something about seeing the people you once loved get hitched that hits a weirdly hidden melancholic chord in your heart. To...